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Sunday, July 3, 2016

I just changed up my website! I have decided to use my website as a blog too. But I will keep writing my thoughts about some topics and posting some photos on this blog. Because this blog is one of my cozy zones! I am very guarded and mind to talk about my deepest thing in public. Even though everyone can see my blog if they somehow know the address of the blog, I feel very comfortable to write here. I can write literally anything in my head.

Well, this is my website called Jarvorin. I used to upload my paintings and some photos up there. I put much more effort these days on the website. Because I wanted to make a professional-looking website. Hopefully, it would work out well. haha. Anyway have a look! Hope you`d enjoy it! 


Vacate The Places For New Starts In July!

Sunday, June 26, 2016

 Yay! I am moving! Well new studio is placed in the same building. Yet, it feels great that I am moving out and making a new home.  

 June has not been passed yet. But this month was pretty like a preparing month to change and move onto somewhere. After my April chaos, I changed a lot. I learned a lot about relationships among people around me and also about very deep side of me. Basically I learned how to deal with them. I mean, dealing with any problem occurred between myself and other people and between me and myself.

Now I believe, there will be something good for me at the end in any ways.

Love from Serene.

*iphone6 + analog paris filter*

What I Learned From Guys!

Thursday, June 23, 2016

I am writing this inspired by the article '7 Reasons You Keep Falling For The Wrong Guy'.
This article is pretty brilliant. I very agree with especially 2 reasons of them in the article. I am going to write down 'Things I Learnt From Dating With Guys' citing the reasons the editor said.

1. This Is So Difficult To Meet Someone Who Genuinely Loves You.

You know what? I always thought that guys I was dating with were loving me. NO THEY NEVER DID! Sadly I realized that when I did sort of breakup. It is hard to say 'breakup' because we were never in a relationship. Anyway, when I start to like someone then my emotion gets deeper so fast and I start to be deluded into thinking that me and him are being together soon. And few days later, I also think I am loving him, although it isn`t love in other`s opinions, and think he may feel in the same way as I do. If you are like me, please don`t. Please stop being a loser. I will try not to be like this again as well. Keep this in your head, 'falling in love is not easy and is not a common phenomenon'. When men fall in love, they will try to care of you, adore you, support you, cheer you up, and, most of all, protect you! Also, they will never be afraid to sacrifice themselves only for you. Yourself will be the first in his life. But how the guy you saw last night could love you? True love? I think it`s from the power of support and trust of each other. 

ps. Guys are all same. You can find your love but be aware that they would just want to sleep with you. If that was what you were looking for, then just go head. That`s not my business.

2. Try To Meet Good Guys Even If You`re Not Gonna Marry To Them.

First of all, the term of 'GOOD' means their personalities. Alright, some people says, "You`re young. You have to date with as many guys as you can. It all helps you to find Mr. right in the end." Okay, dating with many guys might help you for any reasons. But remember, do not meet ANY guys. Hey have you ever watched news about boyfriend kills girlfriend because she was annoying him or dumped him. Guys, there are so many crazy people in the world. My mom always tells me that who you get along with will change your life and especially for guys, you have to be more prudent. So true. 

By the way I saw some girls having sex with just any guys around them. I want to say Please... You will regret this so much. In north American culture or even more others, some teens and the early 20s tend to think of sex as a 'not-a-big-deal', GIRLS.. it is your life I know, but please don`t be a whore. You deserve better. You may be flattered by guys hitting on you at a bar. Just enjoy the attention and don`t go further unless you think he`s Mr.right.

3. You never can change him.

People don`t change easily. Even changing our diet, or lifestyle is difficult. Then how difficult to change someone`s personalities or habits? It is almost impossible. Some lovebirds say if you want to keep your relationship more longer and keep loving him unconditionally, then you need to accept his shortcomings, bad habits ect. Just you need to love himself as he is. Not perfect him in your daydream.  

4. Know Yourself First, Before You Love Someone.

By reading the article, I realized that I was not ready to love. I mean, I was not ready to do real love and was very afraid of commitment. I wanted to be loved but I was afraid to love them in real. I know it doesn`t sound fair. It was maybe because of the pressure I felt from the meaning of the love that I defined. Because I thought love was coming from the feeling you want to support him, share your life with him, and being always together. It sounded very romantic and also envious for me. On the other hand, it was scary to me. As I told you guys at the another blog post called 'My Depression Story', I always need my space and I honestly don`t trust anyone. I am terrified to open myself to others. (But ironically I used to fall in love so easily. Well, I don`t anymore.) So I am now giving myself time to rest more and be relaxed. Then I will love (well.. if I have anyone to love).

 Are you ready to love?

Seoul Trip! (21.May.2016) #Seoul

Monday, May 23, 2016
Since I no longer live in Seoul, it gets so hard to go to Seoul to see my friends. Because I live in Suncheon where is 3hrs to 4hrs far from Seoul. However I really needed to see my friend called Hyeri. Because she is my best friend who spent my very short Hongik University life. Also she is the only one who has same interests as myself, can go to shopping with me with no boredom nor awkwardness, and can support each other. 


(whisper) I have only 3 friends I think of them as the best friends. 
They don`t know each other by the way. lol


First thing first, we were so starving.. so we headed to this hambagu place on Garosu-gil(street) in Sinsa. This place is called 'Heya'. They only sell 2 types of hambagu steaks as you can see in the picture. Both are so good. Mine (brown sauce one) is very classic one. Hers was so bizarre to me in fact. Because I never saw a hambagu like that. But it was super delicious! I personally didn`t like hambagu steak because of sausage texture. However here I could actually feel the minced meets melting in my mouth. So good! So Japanese also.


Bingsoo is the best Korean dessert ever. Every Sulbing is always packed in a hot day.
But it`s too good to not go



 We then went to Yongsan I-Park mall. First of all we visited The Gundam Base! Because I was keening to go there! and wanted to buy some Jibanyan figure.   


Also we visited Ghibli shop! It was a heaven for us. lol


Calcifer pan and the tuner! So cute ><

 Then we took a taxi to go to Itaewon where is our favorite spot in Seoul.
We wanted to go to Vatos. But the line was so long so we just went to Prost.
Nachos were not the best here but nachos can`t go wrong.
It is always so fun to reminisce old days with the best friend. Especially with Heyri. 2 years ago, when we went to Prost for the first time. Indeed it was our first time to go to a fancy bar (it looked fancy to us lol). So we both were super nervous. Because there were only 30-something or 20`s people hanging around. We had a good night but both were so awkward being at the bar. lol

Tried Hanbok In Jeonju!

Sunday, May 22, 2016
As Jeonju is getting popular to travel in South Korea, this time I headed to Jeonju to travel around with my best friend, Seoha Jung! We planned to look around 'Hanok Village' in Hanbok which is a traditional Korean dress. Hanok means the traditional Korean house by the way! You might feel Jeonju is the city having lots of historic buildings and places. Also the city is famous for BIBIMBAP! You can say Jeonju is the city of bibimbap though. haha Enjoy the photos!

* Renting rate for my hanbok which was noble women`s dress was 20,000 won (20$value) **including bag and shoes(if you need) for a hour.  However they gave us 2 hours because it was on weekday.
** only in case you pay in cash.

Also rates would be little bit different by the shops.


- Yum Yum! -

My Depression Story

Wednesday, May 4, 2016

I randomly saw this video on Facebook and it drove me all the way to write about my story here in my blog. 

My Depression

Okay I am only 20 years old. And I know I am very young. However, when it comes to depression I think I have gone through with this thousand times. So I suppose I can talk about this? huh

I think it`s a chronic issue of me(and us indeed). In this modern society, almost everyone has depression on their ways. Main causes of my depression are relationship, and my future. I lately realized that whatever causes your depression, what actually makes you to get into the depression is yourself hiding real yourself.

I know it`s really hard to figure out who you really are. It would definitely take whole life. But you should know yourself. By aging and experiencing different kind of situations and cases, I learned myself. Also looking back my very young days does really help to find myself. Because people don`t change as much as you want. haha

I am Scorpio, just in case it can be any excuses. I just don`t like revealing my very deep secret. I mean I usually do not have any secret. But I don`t know. It`s really hard to explain. I don`t have a secret but I have. It`s like if I think it is a real secret of me then, I do not talk about it to anybody. Only me keeping the story. But it`s not really a secret! it`s actually nothing but I just don`t want to talk. ho.. hopefully one of you could feel me. For example, when I was very little, whenever my mom asked me what I am up to then I always answered 'I am doing something'. And I got annoyed when my mom got inquisitive about it. I felt like mom was invading my area. Mom usually was not like that luckily. I am very shy and unfamiliar to let out my own things to public or even friends and family. I am very glad to have a blog and a website. Because it is not a real world so I feel very comfortable and free with writing something on these.

I tend to try to be nice to everyone. Being nice is good. However, if it hurts you, it is no longer any good. I was always trying to be polite and nice. So I annoyingly can`t complain in person. You may now think I might be a bitch. Listen. If I get any annoyed by my friends, I don`t tell them. I mean if it`s just about making decision or something then I do. But when it comes to personality then I don`t really do. I am brutally straight forward sometimes(or usually haha). However somehow I can`t be straightforward about this. I guess maybe inside of me is worrying if I hurt someone to say their bad things and what they are annoying me. At the same time I think it would be only me who get stressful with what they do. But 'I' get stressful, 'I' get annoyed, and 'I' get mental by that. When I got depressed with this I talked this to mom crying. She screamed to me "What the hell are you doing. It`s your life. Why you can`t be selfish at this? It`s not about being polite or rude. You`re just dragged by them. Stop walking on eggshells! Why would you?" Then I realized that I should be living as I am. If I don`t like, I don`t like. We should say that. Being rude and polite is the next step after you say it. Be myself! That was what I got from mom`s call.

I told my friends. What happened?

I used to not talk my dark side to my friends. (I don`t really make friends who I can/'SHOULD' talk everything happened to me by the way and I don`t want to. Because I just don`t like that. That just makes gossips and rumors. And I don`t like talking too much about me.) However, at this time I thought I should really talk my depression to my friends. Because I needed my own time. I am more like an introverted person. Hence I can charge myself being alone and taking my own time at home or where else. I don`t like texting and massaging every single minutes. I actually hate that. I like to text when I have something to tell them. Anyway I told them that I was having depression and I needed my own time. Also added I`d be alright soon. They seemed to understand me and spared me time. Fortunately my flight to Korea was around the corner so I flew to Korea not seeing them before I left. In fact, I saw one of the friends at the gym randomly. It was super awkward. I was actually okay. I was alright to see her. But she got awkward!!! She thought she might annoy me for any reasons and I was not ready to see her. I was embarrassed. I regretted that I told them.(I don`t now!) Well, I can`t tell you guys confessing your depression to your friends is a good idea or not. Although I can surely say, JUST TELL THEM. If they are friends who really care of you then they will bear you. Don`t worry. They will understand you. If not, then you don`t have to get along with them. That`s simple. Don`t worry. The important is YOU, yourself.

My Favorite App ; YODHA

Wednesday, March 23, 2016

Life isn`t easy. Life has hardship and also has pleasure. Whenever we get some issues in our lives, we normally get panicky and fretful. However, if there is a problem, it means there is a solution. I believe everything happening in my life is just one of my progress to reach to one point I`ve wanted to be at. Everything happens for some reasons. So, if I get into some problems, I just believe 'Okay, it doesn`t mean the end of the world. It`s just a page of my life.'

Lately, I have got so much chaos all of sudden in my life. I obviously got very stressful and was in panic. I knew the solution. However, because I have to concern all things around me and what I deal with, I tried to find another solution. Solution 1 was very simple and very certain in terms of getting the result I need. On the other hand, solution 2 and others, they are not very confident of the result, but there is also possibility to get it with them.

Objectively I don`t have to worry what to choose. That`s actually obvious to follow solution 1. However, as we all do, we tend to get complicated when we are in some issues.

At that time all we need to do is listing what is really important to us. You can`t get everything at the same time during the process to solve your problem. Just say 'I`ll catch up with you later' to all things you want to keep but you have to leave. I know, you will get very nervous to leave them. But listen, when you sucessfully get through all stuffs you are encountering, then you can surely catch them up later. Don`t worry.

For me, as a very overthinker and also very indecisive person, I use this app called YODHA. Which is basically horoscope app. I freaking believe horoscope. I know sometimes they are not true. But sometimes they are!! Most importantly they help me to decide some tricky stuffs I face with and also make me to get very objective in any chaos or any situation.

For using this app, downloading is free. You also get free question on your first downloading day. After that you will pay $5.49(CAD) per a question.

Best part of believing this is I know it would not be true and if something happens like the astrologer presumes, you then know what to do or at least you can console yourself.

Lastly I want to say who would like to download this app after reading my blog post, 'your life is made by yourself'. Not god or zodiac sign. It can help you to be mentally stable and to calm down. However, your life is yours. Do not try to follow everything they say. They are just saying to help you. But you know your life more than they do.

To Download: Yodha My Astrologer & Daily Horoscope for Zodiac Signs Love Compatibility By Astrology Birth Chart by Love Astrology and Horoscope Compatibility by Yodha Nepalese Vedic Center Ltd

Me On Holidays, Lessons from 2015 |Serene In South Korea

Wednesday, March 2, 2016

March has come already. 

My astrologer said March is pretty good month to find my love or someone else.
Even if he was not right, I would rather be hoping to meet someone, whoever it`d be, and definitely be happy to meet anyone I will pass by.
Luckily, I have been resting at home real home by 13th of March. Where is in Suncheon-si(si means city),South Korea. I have been seeing my friends I missed a lot and hanging out with my family as well.

 went for hike with my family
 met my lovely friend, Chaewon


 and Seoha!

 Absolutely had soju too haha. It`s in fact fruit-soju. Way better than normal soju!!


 The thing I really learnt, living alone being apart from family and friends, is 'we have been taking so many things around us for granted'. We are surrounded by nature, people, buildings, cars etc. And sometimes we want to hide from everything just because we get sick of it. However, there is no hideaway unless we appreciate the things we have gotten in our lives. I suppose, I had been saying "Thank you" quite a lot of times to many people but I did not say that much to my family as I did to the others. By backing to Korea for my little holidays, I started to say 'Thank you' for just about everything they did for me. I actually thought I said 'thank you' a lot before, but I had never ever ever said 'thank you' to mom for doing my laundry, cooking for meals, and even for supporting me. We, I mean my family including myself, were probably overlooking that all things she did for us were what we always have to truly appreciate and be thankful about. I did not only mean it for saying 'thank you' to your mom. I am saying, because 'it is really important for any kind of relationships among people around you'. Feel appreciated and thankful. When you say 'thank you' to anyone you`ve got along for very little thing(but it is not actually), he or she would love you more. 


X Serene

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